AUTOPSY

.AUTOPSY.. Director: Adam Gierasch. Writer: Adam Gierasch, Evan Katz, Jace Anderson. ..AFTERDARK HORRORFEST is held in October 2008 near Halloween.This is one of -8- films that were shown in theaters as part of their 3rd FILM FESTIVAL. There are only a very few theaters around the country that run the festival which {if memory serves} runs over 3 days / 2-3 films per day / at a cost around $75.00. I always try to make the film festival eash year, but due to the workload here alone, it's almost impossible. This review is based on the DVD RELEASE through LIONSGATE.

..This is basically a haunted house story, set in an older-styled hospital buried deep in southern Louisiana. The opening title sequence reminds me of "CLOVERFIELD" in it's "watch me on tape" intro and does nothing to build or explain character, except for that these characters acting like goofs. We have seen a basic, very familiar story structure like this time and time again, and I do not mean in this genre only. Just think: "ALIEN" in a hospital - that's basically the film, right down to the female lead.

..Our heros: All 5 are 20 something friends: 2 couples and a sole pothead who used to be the boyfriend of one of the girls, who is now coupled up with someone else in the group - returning home late night from Marti-Gras {NO, the girls -DIDN'T- earn their beads the old fashioned way... very, very surprising for a movie of this genre} and drive smack-dab into a tree. Bye-bye car... we are stuck in the middle of nowhere, oh damn! All are slightly injured, no one's cell phone works, pothead has to take a piss, an almost dead guy pops out from under the car, yet within just mere minutes the paramedics arrive on scene. WOW.. these guys are good! Well... not really...

..You can tell immediately that these dudes are just wrong... they literally drag the crash victim out from beneath the wrecked vehicle across the pavement, they don't even stabilize his neck first, there were no gloves, they throw him into the ambulance {which has no equipment in it - had ta make room for ALL FIVE KIDS TO FIT IN THERE}, neither paramedic thinks to perform medical aid to the victim..this is great. He instead rides -shotgun- in the front of the ambulance with the driver on the way back to the hospital !!! I SAY SUE THE HELL OUTTA THEM NOW.. Ahhhhhh...my back!!!

..The films most note-worthy talent is actually found {behind} the camera: MAKEUP EFFECTS: Gary J. Tunnicliffe, who worked on the "FEAST" movies. In all my years of watching a lot of horror films {remember - I grew up with Freddy and Jason when it was new}, I have never seen such PERFECTLY EXECUTED GORE EFFECTS in my life! I am personally not one to embrace these types of images - nor am I at all offended by them, BUT... they were incredibly done and totally fit within the context of the {thin} story. These effects alone, if you are into that, is worth the rental. Reading around on other reviews of this film, almost all other reviewers agree with me on this to be true.

..The film stars Robert Patrick {TERMINATOR 2}, Jenette Goldstein {who played "Vasques" in ALIENS. I DIDN'T EVEN RECOGNIZE HER AND I -KNOW- THAT FILM}, and Jessica Lowndes in the female lead {finding within her film character the all-so-familiar "Sara Connor" / "Ripley" traits of turning fear into fight - YOU GO GIRL!!}. I will mention an actor of note who is always worth watching onscreen is Robert LaSardo. With over 90 film & television credits to date, I am almost sure you will recognize his incredible body art and performances in films such as {DEATHRACE-2008, NIP/TUCK, The SHIELD}

..I really don't want to bore you with the other actors.. they are basically targets, and perform as such... probably never see them in anything else anyway. I mean... everyone is actually well cast for their parts and do rather ok with the limited material that they have to work with here. They are not required to recite SHAKESPERE.. nor should they even attempt it in any foreseeable future if they wanna work. They got through it, predictable characters that they are here. If it ain't on the page, it ain't on da stage!

..The hospital is totally desolate in the middle of the night except for our 5 targets, 2 just out of jail paramedics, a nurse with a cleanliness fetish, one sole doctor who is vague in his answers, and about 4-5 screwed up extras that are rarely seen wandering aimlessly throughout the dimly, but colorfully lit hospital halls. Once the group arrives at the hospital, events basically play out in real time. One by one they are taken away, or wander away from the waiting room, against the nurse's urgings to stay put, to receive medical attention, or even worse - investigate on their own through the hospital for their now missing friends {ALIEN}. The phone ringing at the nurses station basically says "NEXT"... your turn to disappear!

..I do not want to give too much of the rest of the again, {thin} storyline... as things slowly, but not boringly soon develop, and the {subplot} and "real" story of what's really going on and what you are actually seeing all comes into play. Keep your eye on the blonde as she is wandering the halls. She gets a big hug from one of the male patients that she will never, ever forget. I think it was the most creative and amazing shock in the film - again thanks to the MAKE UP EFFECTS work of Gary J. Tunnicliffe which are just BRUTAL and that's a compliment!!

..The last 30 or so minutes are basically a foot race amongst survivors hiding, then running around getting lost peeking into rooms, then running around again to try to out get of the hospital alive. There are a couple of boners in the film dealing with finding a working cell phone, then losing it again to avoid capture - doesn't work. The other was with a lone police officer showing up at the hospital to investigate the 911 call. This one is that a survivor is just only 3 feet from a now {unlocked} front door.. just run & ur safe - done! Of course, you know they will do just the opposite: plead with the officer that they are in danger and not acting crazy and take the officer {back through} the hospital on a search for their friends with out police backup! Oh... and of course, the required act of self sacrifice to save another... so easy to read before hand it was embarrassing.

..The midway sub-plot, only a cast of 8 performers of character - somewhat, a decent performance by Robert Patrick as the Doctor on a mission, GREAT makeup effects, decent lighting and a ok pacing gets this film a good rating from me. Defiantly worth the rental fee - BUY IT if you are a gore freak - you will love it and probably sign up for film school if your mom lets you. BEST OF NOTE: The {ALTERNATE ENDING} on the DVD {Tara & I both thought} was a -better choice- and should have been used instead!! I actually enjoyed parts of the "MAKING OF" featurette and thought it was rather informative and was necessary to include. Recommended..

DIRECT FILM SITE: http://www.horrorfestonline.com/#/dvd

Gary J. Tunnicliffe DIRECT FILM SITE http://www.2hoursinthedark.com/index.html

..OUR ADVICE TO THE FILMMAKERS would be to burn the original camera negative asap so no further contamination to the viewing public will occur. If your eyesight and hearing is impaired, you won't be adversely affected as the rest of us.

..GOOD ATTEMPT, and maybe - possibly entertaining to some, but not most. I got through it without gouging my eyes out, yet have a sense of dizziness due to the film's stupidity level.

..RECOMMENDED. Sat through it with no feelings of nausea and dare I say it, I was entertained!

..VERY RECOMMENDED. Finally we have what can be called an actual film. Both entertaining and accurate in detail. Recommended HIGHLY by Visionsmagazineonline.com

..FILMMAKING PERFECTION. Worthy of the archival process. Own it in your own film library. No questions asked.

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